mindful minute

Drama Addiction

Written by Mark Fontaine

 I am sure that you are familiar with chemical addictions to intoxicating substances. An unappreciated addiction in our society is the addiction to drama.  It manifests itself in relationships.

If you are undertaking a healing journey to achieve more balance and peace within your life, drama comes up and tests you. People who really want serenity in their lives and relationships are turned off by drama.  When it appears, they quickly move on

 Drama addiction is actively encouraged in our media. Relationships in movies, reality T.V. and talk shows usually involve lying, deception, affairs and dysfunction in far greater proportion than real life. 

If you have an uninteresting or monotonous life, chaos helps you feel alive. If you feel a need to create drama in your life and relationships, you are likely compensating for emptiness. You may only feel alive when you get an adrenaline rush that lets you know you have manufactured another crisis.

Are you drawn to chaotic, unstable people? Do you feel compelled to help people who aren’t taking responsibility for the problems in their lives? Do you create unnecessary drama in your life by choosing chaotic people or by creating chaos yourself? Do you have an inability to handle stress without acting out?  Are you quick to lash out when other people say or do things you don’t like?  Do you accomplish little in your life plan because all the focus is on your toxic relationships?

If you recognize some of these traits in yourself, examine the types of relationships you have created. Did you mistake intensity, need, lust or drama for love? What did you do to promote the drama?  What provoking remarks or behaviors did you engage in?

Awareness is a first step. Then become mindful of your environment and relationship dynamics.  Pay attention.  Observe the people around you.  Watch how they relate to each other and to you.  Are you getting too involved in the outcome?  Should you simply be there to witness, not to participate?  Collect information that will help you deal with upcoming interactions you may be involved in. Begin to recognize when drama addiction is happening.

It is still up to you to choose whether to play the game or choose to see it for what it is and let it move by.  When you are looking to create peace and calm within your life, drama takes a back seat.  Adrenaline is no longer needed if we develop exciting lives, set goals, and find things to do that interest us.

Tags: addiction, drama, drama addiction, mark fontaine, mindful, mindful minute, mindfulness